poetry

Bad Santa

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You better watch out… You don’t and you’ll cry
You better not doubt… I’m telling you why…
Santa Flaws is coming to town!

He smells like a fungus. He’s covered with lice.
He spits when he talks… and he’s not very nice.
Santa Flaws is coming to town!

He sneaks in while you’re sleeping
And eats up all the cake
He drinks the beer and kicks the dog
So beware for goodness sake!

You better watch out… You don’t and you’ll cry,
You better not doubt… I’m telling you why… Santa Flaws is coming to town!
by Roberta Baird

The side of the family that no one wants to talks about!

Ruby Rue

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Ruby Rue makes magnificent stew.
Though her secret ingredient nobody knew
Onions and turnips and celery root
Frog legs and toenails and of course eye of newt
Dinner at Ruby’s became all the rage
Her name dropped at parties, the society page
The line for a table became a quite joke
But Ruby was cordial as she pinched and she poked
All things have an ending, just as Ruby feared
The crowds had soon dwindled, her guests disappeared.
“Table for one,” whispered poor Ruby Rue
It’s hard to keep friends when they’re on the menu
Poem and artwork by Roberta Baird